By Jonathan Gabay
 You
are the most important person in the world. That may sound crass, but it is true.
Without you, the world would be poorer. From the moment you were born, through
simply being you, the lives of hundreds and thousands of people have changed.
Some dramatically, some subtly; all irreversibly.
Make contact
Try and recollect everyone with whom you had direct or indirect
contact over the last twenty-four hours, including anyone you spoke to on the
phone or contacted via the Web, or even met hurriedly in the supermarket…
…Unless you are housebound, I bet that in terms of direct
contact -the number of people you spoke to exceeded eight. To be conservative
- call it four.
Today you may have already spoken to or met another four new
contacts, over next week you may have made an impact on twenty-eight different
people; with the potential to cause them - if only fleetingly - to be more assertive
in their actions.
Let's assume that of those twenty-eight, only twenty-two give
you more than thirty seconds 'conscious' thinking time. In other words, alter
their ways - even modestly. For instance, through their brief encounter with you
remembering to buy something. Or, on talking to you re-thinking an approach towards
handling a situation.
For example, the other day I was at my local supermarket.
My wife warned me off buying double cream milk - I am struggling with a diet.
I was walking down the dairy goods aisle - about to pick up a pint when I saw
a man with a boy - presumably his son. The man was around my age - not fat - not
thin - just right. The boy dashed about here and there, cheerily chased by dad.
Nothing dramatic. However, the episode was enough to make me think what would
happen if I put on so much weight that I could no longer chase around my son.
I decided to walk pass the double cream milk selection. Now
I am relating the story to you - who as far as I know - may also be struggling
with dieting. Moreover, who knows where else this story may lead you?
So, over the next week, you'll potentially 'meet' twenty-two
different people. By the end of a calendar month, you would have directly - in
other words, consciously - altered the assertive levels of eighty-eight people.
Within a year, you will have affected positively 1,056 people, multiplying itself
year after year.
Before too many New Year's Eve celebrations, you could have
given thousands of people a confidence boost, which strengthens their short or
long-term resolve and morale. That's got to make you feel good!
The most crucial aspect about understanding this power is
than none of those people will even begin to subconsciously allow your influence
to affect their interests until you start to think about changing the thinking
patterns of one person in particular: You.
1+1 = consequences
Consequences are part and parcel of everything you do. Consider who you are, what
you present to the world and why. (Oh blimey - sounds like a brand audit!).
Many sociologists and psychologists suggest that you are the
product of your own society. Imagine society as a dense mix of soapy liquid, which
amalgamates lives. All liquid is fluid. So is your immediate circle. Some people
will stay around, like close family and friends. Others may make fleeting appearances.
All are interdependent and so critical to the global solidity, fluidity and consistency
of your life - as you are to theirs.
In addition to family, these people who form 'links' with
you, include peers at work, school, club, mosque, synagogue, temple, church, as
well as acquaintances with whom you would like to establish stronger connections
and even the overall environment in which you live. Together these people and
influences affect your confidence.
If an 'Almighty being' studied the liquid substance, rather
than seeing countless tiny suds, there would be a dense consistency. Its concentration
would depend on the richness and proximity of the people making up the total body
of the mass.
If the 'being' examined closely an individual person, 'he'
would take the equivalent of a gigantic bubble-blowing hoop - the sort you get
with toy bubble kits - dip it into the dense liquid and blow.
How high an individual bubble travelled would depend on the
person's (bubble) character. The vigour, which fortifies that bubble, relies on
the group of people surrounding the outer- layer of the bubble. Whilst these people
support the individual's central needs, desires, they still allow the bubble to
be translucent rather than shrouded by their own personal agendas.
In the scale of things, that single bubble (person) is only
a tiny 'effervesce' forming part of an endless lather of six billion sprays of
foam, which mutually make up the lives of everyone on the planet. Yet, with determination
and conviction that bubble - YOU - can rise high above the billows of froth.
Take a look inside
Just as some bubbles naturally gravitate towards each other,
once you have the confidence to be yourself and allow others to appreciate that
quality, so your world will become supported and embraced by the people who really
matter. What's more, thanks to your confidence, that support will be sustained
and eventually increased until your tiny bubble becomes a great cloud which can
drift as high as you can imagine.
My Reinvent Yourself and Assert Yourself courses at the CIM show how to boost
your confidence as well as get your home and life balance just right. For me,
these are two of the most important courses I offer through the CIM.
People emerge feeling that when it comes to being counted
upon at work, they are no longer idle observers.
If you would like to grab total confidence, join them.
Reinvent Yourself and Assert Yourself can be booked on the web at www.cim.co.uk
About the Author
Check out Jonathan's site at www.gabaynet.com
Jonathan is an author of several books including Reinvent Yourself. He is on CIM's
core faculty and personal coach to leaders at some of the world's most successful
companies.
You can call him directly on 07973416226
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